Side Effects

Some side effects are major--hair loss is like that.  The first chemo took care of that--second one not at all, and the third time around my hair just thinned out.  It is a little early to see what will happen this time around.  I've still got five great cranial prostheses and several hats, so I'm prepared if that happens.  I've never had a problem with nausea--there's lots of medication for that and if I feel the least bit queasy, I take something. 
Then there are the minor ones that are merely annoying, so I tend to forget about them.  Mouth sores are now officially on that list.  With no warning whatsoever, I woke up this morning with my lower lip encrusted with blood and a popped blister on the inside of said lip.  I have stuff for it, but it is annoying. 
There are no orc wars, for which I am grateful.  I just feel generally crappy.  I'm so glad I bought a new duvet last year.  Crawling under it and reading or knitting is amazingly comforting.  I've felt way worse--see April through August 2008.  I've also felt way better.  To paraphrase Sophie Tucker, I prefer better.
Thus endeth the whining session.
xxooxx

Chemo 4.1 days 2 and 3

Day one did not end well.  I got all dressed up and went to Pacific Star's Installation.  I wanted to go for Marina, who is a first time Worthy Matron.  I was hurting, so I left as soon as it was over--didn't even look at the refreshments.  I took helpful drugs and set the alarm for 7 to be at church, ready to cook, by nine.
I am glad to say that I felt better Saturday morning.  The Dex was doing its job.  My face was bright red but I would survive.  There were lots of helpers in the kitchen.  They all wore name tags reading "Anne's Minion."  We start with cranberry sauce--I like to fill the church with Thanksgiving smells.  After the cranberry sauce comes the stuffing.  Mine is very traditional.  Vegetables and sourdough bread had been chopped the day before, so throwing the stuffing together is really pretty easy--especially with so much help.  I'm getting much better an giving instructions and letting the Minions do the work.  We had five turkeys, all weighing in at a little over 20 lbs.  The timing is so much easier when the birds are the same size.  We had them stuffed, buttered, and wrapped in tons of foil and ready for the ovens at 11:30.  We went home to rest and God did the cooking.  Back to church at 4 and took the birds out of the ovens--well, the Minions did that.  I wasn't allowed to lift anything.  We unstuffed the birds and started sucking up the juices for quarts of gravy.  That was my last official act.  Kathryn, our new pastor, grounded me and it was up to the Minions to finish the job.  The Minions were marvelous.
It is wonderful to see the church full of happy diners.  The side dishes and desserts are all pot luck.  I was tired, but didn't feel too bad--living better with chemistry.  I didn't stay for the Talent Show.  It is always good, but I was wearing out and Big Game was on.  I have my priorities, after all.  I've been following Big Game since the mid sixties.  Anything can happen at Big Game.  I expected us to be slaughtered this year--that S school being nationally ranked and all.  We lead for most of the first half.  The Bears played their hearts out and only lost by a field goal.  I was very proud of them.
I'm uncomfortable today.  I haven't needed as many drugs today as yesterday, but I haven't done as much today as yesterday.  I'm still testing the reactions to this chemo.  So far, so good.  I have Curves tomorrow and a Trustees meeting tomorrow night.  I think I can do that.
Thanks for the prayers.
xxooxx

Chemo 4.1

Chemo at 10, home by noon.  It started with the usual blood sucking, numbers being good, I started with Dex and Zofran, about half an hour of Topotecan, then flushing the port then home by way of the bakery.  I have my calendar for the rest of November and for December--three more chemos and two doctor appointments.  It's either going to be a very long six months or very short.  I went to Curves this afternoon--everyone thinks keeping that us is a very good idea.  I'm not feeling anything from the chemo, though my doctor did increase my long acting pain meds--I told her this morning that I was popping Percocet like they were M&M's.  I'm hoping to make it to Pacific Star's installation tonight.  I just have to get into a formal, get there, sit there and be cute.  I can do that.  Tomorrow is the church Thanksgiving dinner.  Yes, I'm cooking again.  The Dex should keep me feeling good until Sunday.  Stay tuned.  We'll see how this one works.
xxooxx

I think I've heard this song before

Got the results of last week's scan today.  I could have waited--forever.  I wasn't really surprised because I have been in more pain lately.  My CA-125 (a tumor marker) has increased quite a bit--for me--still below what they normally worry about, but since mine has always been low, we go on relative terms.  Relatively, it has doubled.  I also have some lymph nodes that have grown.  So we start new chemo--Topotecan--next Friday, then Nov 28, a week after that I'll see my doctor and the next week it starts over again.  After two of three months of this, we'll repeat the scan and see where we are.  Pray for me again--or still--as the case may be.
Last night was chapter installation.  That was a milestone for me.  I wasn't sure I would make it through the term.  I did it.  I'm a pretty tough old bird.  Don't feel so tough right now, but I'll bounce back.
I finished the scarves for the Grand Star Points and gave them to Grand Adah last night.  They are really pretty, but I don't think I want to do another scarf for a long time.  I'm now working on a commissioned pair of mittens and socks.  When I finish those projects, I'll dig into the boxes of yarn and start working my way through.  Good thing I have lots of knitting time.
That's it for now--that's more than enough for now.
xxooxx

Catching up yet again

Guess it's time to write something so that my sister won't think I'm dead.  I'm not.  I realize it has been a while.  Last entry was after Sonoma.  It was our new pastor's first Sunday.  Today was her installation.  It was a long journey, but now we are official.  The happily retired Pastor Nominating Committee can draw a huge sigh of relief and say to each other, "job well done."
So what have I been doing.  I finished the scarves with a week to spare.  They were well received.  I have an ante-room meeting and Installation left to go next Thursday.  I wasn't entirely sure that I would complete my term as Worthy Matron, but I did it.  We had a good chapter year.
Grand Chapter was a couple of weeks ago--one of the best I've been to and I've been attending them since 1982.  Kim and Don presided beautifully.  Everything went smoothly and I never had to correct their grammar in my head.  It was really a pleasure.  Grand Chapter, as usual, was followed by four days at Yosemite.  They were glorious days--warm in the daytime and cool in the evening.  We didn't do much, just enjoyed hanging out.  There was even a little water in Yosemite Falls.  The weather being fabulous, Tioga Pass was open, so we went on to Reno for two nights.  Once again, we had a blast.  I couldn't lose.  Well, I'm sure I could have if I'd tried hard enough and long enough.  We didn't have the option of staying extra days this time, so I came out ahead.  I came home with more cash than I left with.
Now i really am home.  Next Yosemite trip will be in May, and that's a long time from now.  I had my follow up CT scan yesterday.  I'll get the results next Friday when I see Dr. Chee.  I'm not expecting anything bad.  I've been feeling good--maybe a little peppy.  It's been a long time since I could say that.
You're up to date.  I have a new scarf project, but this one is only five and I'm almost done with the fourth one.  My goal is to be finished by Thursday.  It may happen or it may not.  The world will not come to an end.  After that is done, I get to move back to socks and hats and try to put a dent in the yarn cave.
xxooxx

Home for a while

Leaving the Inn is really hard.  As with Yosemite, I know that it will be there and I can always go back.  This was an amazing visit.  It was almost spiritual.  I know I'm paying a king's ransom for the privilege, but it is more than that.  The love that surrounds me there is palpable, both at the Spa and The Big 3.  I love my friends there and they love me. They pray for me and take care of me.  It is almost as though my time there was one big Watsu, and I'm floating happily through my time there.  Saturday was toes, fingers, hair, and scalp, all with Rudolfo.  I got to visit with Bebe too.  Bebe is another one who seems to know what's going on inside me.  In January 2010, before I had my scan and people started saying "remission," as she was doing reflexology on my feet, Bebe looked at me and said, "You're better."  She was right.  Rudolfo is just a sweaty.  How can I not enjoy my last hours there since they are spent in the salon?  I'm not always glamorous through the various wonderful treatments, but after a morning in the salon, I leave pretty.
Sunday was a very special day too,  It was our new Pastor's first service with us.  We've been waiting for her for so long.  It was a happy time.  And I got home in time to see the 49ers win.  Life is good.
I got up today full of purpose.  I did some picking up in the bedroom, remembering my plan at the beginning of the year to put, throw, or give away at least 10 things a day.  If I look at the whole mountain, it is just too depressing.  But anyone can deal with 10 things a day.  If I do more, so much the better.  I also did some vacuuming on the landing, stairs, and hall.  I finished the knitting project last night.  Now all I have to do is press all of them and they will be ready to go--and I've moved on to the next project--a hat and mittens--one set, not seventeen.  After that, I'll start on the boxes of yarn.  I've got socks to make for two friends from the Inn.  Gosh--then I'll have to take the finished products up there!  I can handle it.
xxooxx

Happy Skin

Here's my last night in 917.  Thursday morning I started with Reiki with reflexology and a Rejuvenating Kur with Diane.  Reiki is better than a CT scan.  It's almost spooky how Diane knows what is going on with my body.  It was pretty intense.  Diane knows, so I do what she tells me.   The Rejuvenating Kur is quite lovely.  It concludes with a warm oil and a conditioning mask for the hair and scalp.  You don't look glamorous when it's done, but you really feel good.  I took my towel wrapped head to the loggia to rest and let it sink in before I showered it out.  Next was a Thai Massage--great stretching--with Bill, who is 4 months younger than I am.  It's another of those "Will you respect me in the morning" treatments.  Love it.  Last treatment of the day was a Total Body Recovery with David.  This is another of the new treatments.  Starts with a soak and concludes with a massage using icy cold and hot stones--I had wondered why Diane hadn't schedules a Sonoma Stone Massage--this was where I figured it out.
Today was my last Watsu with Laura.  Each provider does generally the same thing, but each one has their own signature.  I think that's why I need so many of them.  After the Watsu, I finally did the Bathing Ritual, since I was already wet.  After that, I lay by the outdoor pool to give my suit time to dry out and read till it was time for my Balance Body with Laura--my last new treatment.  tarts with a foot soak and exfoliation, an amazing body scrub, shower, and massage with really amazing oils.  You leave with spa hair--I never realized how much I can look like Albert Einstein--but your skin feels so good you just don't care.  I napped on the loggia until it was time for my facial.  The facial means things are winding down, which is sad, but it feels wonderful, which is good.  Another rest on the loggia to let the creams soak into my face and feet.  I stayed there till it started to get dark--at least until it was hard to read, and then I got back into clothes and had my dinner.  I had fillet mignon tonight since it is my wedding anniversary (33rd).  Now I'm ready to sit by the fire and knit.  Tomorrow is pedicure, manicure, and hair and scalp treatment with Rudolfo, and then back to the real world.  My body usually goes into shock when it realizes that no one is going to slather it with lotions and oils.  I could do part of it, but it just isn't the same thing.
Right now,  my skin is happy and softer than it has been since before Chemo.  I'm a happy girl.
xxooxx